BREAKING NEWS: Game 6 of Stanley Cup Not On NBC!

NHLPPV

In a jaw dropping announcement today, NHL commissioner  Gary Bettman told the press this afternoon that games 6 will NOT be broadcast on NBC as was planned.  Instead the rest of the Stanley Cup will be Pay Per View only, and shown on channel 927b, this channel is only available for users who have the  “Sports Complete Super Mega Ultra” package.

Gary Bettman was quoted as saying, “We are very excited to usher in a whole new era of  fan loyalty exploitation, and what better time to start than a Stanley Cup Final elimination game?”  When asked what NBC’s response was when they were told of the breach in contract, Bettman replied “I told the execs that they would all be receiving  a personal 50% Pay Per View discount on game 6”.

When the reporters in unison responded with an audible gasp, Gary added:  “What?…I already sent over a dozen “I Love Gary Bettman” bumper stickers”.

Unfortunately, this interview had to be cut short, as Mr. Bettman had to answer a phone call from a very angry NBC executive, who apparently just found one of the bumper stickers on his $800,000 Lamborghini.

NHL on NBC announcers, Mike Emrick and Keith Jones, will be replaced by Golf Channel Emmy winning announcers, Dick Enberg and Nick Faldo, with Vin Scully doing the color.

Coverage will start at 2:00AM tonight, due to the fact channel 927b will be having a Three Stooges marathon scheduled during the original game 6 start time.

If you are sick and tired of Gary Bettman, play our game: Whack-a-Bettman!

 


† Sports Complete Super Mega Ultra package, of course,  is blacked out in Illinois and  Massachusetts.

 

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Barney Miklasz
Barney Miklasz is our site Admin, in his spare time, he enjoys criticizing Ken Hitchcock's line combinations, as well as skydiving off the St. Louis Arch.