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Category Archives: Blues

Hard hitting satire coverage of the St. Louis Blues.

WARNING: Jokes about Ken Hitchcock, Doug Armstrong and Steve Ott are dangerously abundant.

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Let Them Eat Cake!

November 5, 2016 Lumpy Rutherford
marie-armstrong1

Without warning, a great and unyielding goal famine has struck Blues nation.  Hundreds of thousands of devoted fans are starving for more offense, but the powers that be seem unaware…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged Hockey, Parody, St. Louis Blues | Leave a comment

Tom Stillman – Hands Down Best Owner In Sports

October 14, 2016 Lumpy Rutherford
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In a city still bewildered by Stan Kroenke’s decision to move the Rams to Los Angeles, it is refreshing to see the St. Louis Blues owner, Tom Stillman, on opening…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged hands, St. Louis Blues, Tom Stillman | Leave a comment

Blackhawks Dynasty Found Dead

October 13, 2016 Lumpy Rutherford
hawks-dynasty-dead

Late last night the Chicago Blackhawks Dynasty was killed tragically in a hit-and-run incident. Witnesses said the victim had just crossed over at the 3200 block of Salary Cap Boulevard,…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged Blackhawks, Blues, dead, dynasty, Hockey, NHL | Leave a comment

Kill zombie Blackhawk fans in our new game: Blackhawk Down!

September 19, 2016 Barney Miklasz
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Toast Dispatch is excited to release the Alpha version of our new video game: Blackhawk Down! You can play the game here. About the Game Blackhawk Down is a 1st person shooter…
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Posted in Blues, Games | Tagged alpha, blackhawk down, Blackhawks, Blues, Game, video game | Leave a comment

2016 St. Louis Blues Toastie Awards

May 27, 2016 Barney Miklasz
Untitled-1

It’s that time of year again, the St. Louis Blues season has come to and end, so it’s time to look back and recognize those who stood out over the…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged awards, Blues, polls, toastie, twitter, vote | Leave a comment

St. Louis Blues Announce Jake Allen Will be Starting…

May 11, 2016 Lumpy Rutherford
Stars 3

St. Louis Blues coach, Ken Hitchcock, has announced that JAKE ALLEN WILL BE STARTING… a new foundation called Jake and Melinda Gates foundation which aims to put an end to…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged 7, Allen, bait, Blues, click, Game, Jake, Playoffs, stars, starting, titles | 1 Comment

Immortality or Anonymity – It’s a Choice

May 9, 2016 Lumpy Rutherford
Easy-Street

The St. Louis Blues are at a crossroads, a point in time in which a choice must be made, the fence in which to stand on is unavailable. The Blues find themselves in the driver’s seat and a…
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Posted in Blues | Tagged anonymity, Blues, immortality, NHL, Playoffs, stars | Leave a comment

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