No drugs left over in search of Justin Bieber’s plane in N.J.


New Jersey’s Port Authority Fire Department received an emergency call early Friday from the Teterboro Airport control tower, as heavy smoke was seen billowing from Justin Bieber’s private airplane.

Control tower supervisor Timothy Leary Jr. stated,  “As Bieber’s private jet approached from the south, at first, I just thought it was a contrail; but as he started descending, it was clear to me that this was no contrail.  It was thick hazy smoke billowing from the windows of the plane.  The aircraft was also noticeably sluggish, with a very pronounced tilt to one side, so I immediately called the New Jersey Pot Authority.”

Fire Chief William Marley and his crew were dispatched to the scene.  When they arrived, Bieber’s plane had landed and was taxiing on runway 19 with some smoke still visible coming out of the cockpit window.

Fire Chief William Marley, also known as Bob Marley by his friends, commented, “At that point I ordered the fire and rescue crew to don their gas masks and prepare to board the plane on my command.”

Within seconds, the firefighters were preparing to board the plane, when Justin Bieber poked his head outside the cockpit window.  At first Bieber looked confused and dazed by all the commotion, but then he yelled to the fire crew that “everything was cool man”  and “If you would have gotten here 5 minutes ago I would have offered you some of my Jack in the Box Munchie Meal”.

Minutes after the fire department declared the scene clear and began exiting the plane, local law enforcement stormed the plane and began searching for contraband.

Bieber was on board the plane, which arrived at Teterboro from Toronto. Officials told Toast Dispatch News that they executed their authority to conduct a border search because the plane entered from Canada and there was suspicion that there was marijuana on board. Of course, none was left or found.

The singer’s representatives have not returned Toast Dispatch News’ requests for comment.

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Lumpy Rutherford
Lumpy Rutherford is the head writer for the Toast Dispatch. His favorite topics are St. Louis Post-Dispatch writer Jeremy Rutherford and former Blues goalie Jaroslav Halak.