Wastin’ Away Again In Penaltyville.

The St. Louis Blues are back home in the “Big House” for game 22.  On the minds of many fans has been the amount of time served in the Sin Bin by the boys in Blue.  Of course, every season has its anomalies, but certainly the recent rash of ill-advised Homer Simpson-like “D’oh” moments are setting off alarms everywhere. Defensemen hitting pucks over the boards like an MLB Home Run Derby.  Hooks, holds, crosschecking and, of course, the most despicable of all hockey crimes…the Delay Of Game penalty.

homer-simpson-dohThe “too many men on the ice” penalties are just out of control. How bad is it, you ask?  It’s so bad that I could foresee the Fox Sports Midwest cameras on the players during tonight’s national anthem panning across the blue line showing Schwartz, Stastny and Perron; next, Bouwmeester, Pietrangelo and Shattenkirk with Allen in the net.  Now that’s bad!

As I mentioned, ‘Every season has it anomalies;’  and the Penal Colony that is the current manifestation of our St. Louis Blues will no doubt eventually see the error of their ways and right the ship, as it were.  But, in the meantime, we have a little song to help take the edge off our frustration as God fearing Blues fans.

Compliments of Jimmy Duffet – Wastin’ Away Again In Penaltyville.

Sing it like you mean it:

Nibblin’ on CUP cake
Watchin’ the coach bake
All of those fans covered in popcorn oil
Runnin’ my 4th-line
On my front seat blind
Smell those fans hey they’re beginnin’ to boil

Chorus:
Wastin’ away again in Penaltyville
Searching for my lost defenseman and forward
Some people claim that there’s a referee to blame
But I know it’s our own damn fault

I don’t know the reason
I’ll stay here all season
Nothin’ to show but this brand new Panger Bobblehead
But it’s a real beauty
A Mexican cutie
How it got here I haven’t a clue

Chorus:
Wastin’ away again in Penaltyville
Searching for my lost defenseman and forward
Some people claim that there’s a referee to blame
Now I think
Hell, it could be Jackman’s fault

I blew out my T.V.
Stepped on a Jake Peavy
Cut my heel had to cruise on back home
But there’s booze in the blender
And soon it will render
That frozen concoction that helps me hang on

Wastin’ away again in Penaltyville
Searching for my lost defenseman and forward
Some people claim that there’s a referee to blame
But I know it’s our own damn fault
Yes and some people claim that there’s a referee to blame
And I know it’s our own damn fault

IN GAME UPDATE: After two periods we are still “Wastin’ away again Penaltyville,” with mind numbing avoidable penalties.

Will look forward to hearing from Ken Hitchcock as to why it is that we are having this issue.  Communication? Attitude?

A win, will of course make any felony committed by the Blues forgiven and forgotten, until of course, it happens next game.

About the Author


Lumpy Rutherford
Lumpy Rutherford is the head writer for the Toast Dispatch. His favorite topics are St. Louis Post-Dispatch writer Jeremy Rutherford and former Blues goalie Jaroslav Halak.